Going, Going

Almost Gone.

I feel that my thin self is just gone. and it sucks. ive been eating way more lately and can tell ive gained like 4 pounds or so. im afraid to weigh myself. i think if i do, ill just get upset and angry and try to maintain my weight, or even lose more again :/. thats usually what i do every so often, whatever my weight is, i go in this lose-weight kick and thats how ive managed to stay super skinny. now, idk what i am, even. average? idk if im even "thin" or "slender". i dont feel thin or slender. i see growing fat on my stomach that sticks our when i wear my shirts. that didnt used to be there.

but ill do anything, ANY THING, to stay out of a rehab center or get conseling. even if it means gaining a few pounds for a few months. but the very second i get my period im stopping. im not gaining an ounce more.

does anyone know if really underweight people can go on birth control just to get a stable consistent period? i havent had it in two years and need to get it.. will b.c. make it work even though im still probably underweight?? i have no clue. ive never been on b.c. before.

well, i hope everyones doing good. my schedule is so hectic. i never have time to get on this site. ill try harder and talk to people more if i can. have a great week. ((it will be great since we have OBAMA :]]))

Meggy~